what is a holiday?

So we're in New York for "the holidays" and for a myriad of reasons I cringe every time I hear that term.

We're having a great time. We've spent Christmas in Pound Ridge with Grandma and Grandpa, Auntie Margaret, little blips of Minnie Royce Ormsby (the cat who does not enjoy the company of others especially others of the little sort), and visits from Poppa and Mimi, Baba and Papi and Uncle J and Erinn.

Christmas Eve was our usual tradition of take-out and final gift wrapping. This year we had the added challenge of figuring out how to get the masses of gifts under the tree since Isabelle was sleeping on a bed under the tree. Once her breathing relaxed and shifted to a deep steady whishhh and whooooshh, I signaled to Dadda that now would be a good time to put the gifts under the tree. With a couple scares, when Isabelle shifted and stretched we were able to get everything out.

When Isabelle awoke and Henry and I joined her in the studio, she looked at the tree and raised a concern. "Mom, why aren't they all under the tree?". I explained that there were lots of people and that we couldn't fit all the gifts for all the people precisely under the boughs of the tree." The children enjoyed the excitement of the day with family and new toys.

Isabelle understood that we celebrate Chanukah, but that we have Christmas at grandma's house. I don't like that the kids are always opening gifts, but I know that's the prerogative of a grandparent....Christmas, Chanukah, or random Tuesday in July. What I love is that the best times the kids had were climbing upstairs to Grandma and Grandpa's studio loft for a Tea Party with George (the bear) and Arlette (the bear), walking down to the pond to see if there were any ducks, "skating" through grandpa's garden to the "outdoor tea room", running around Bobba and Papi's first floor chasing one another and Isabelle tickling Henry, choosing books from the Bronxville library, exploring the lobby of the Poppa and Mimi's hotel and running about.

I love how much the children enjoy their grandparents and the energy that bounces between the two generations. The appreciation of one little person for one bigger person...one newer human for one more experienced human and vice versa.

In the dictionary a holiday is: noun 1 an extended period of recreation, especially away from home. 2 a day of festivity or recreation when no work is done.

This whole concept of "the holidays" that people refer to as some combination of Thanksgiving, through New Year's is a nightmare. People feel that they have to see everyone they know both friends and family. You have to have a million parties to attend and/or host. Chanukah becomes the Jewish Christmas. It makes me spin just thinking about it. It wasn't until I moved to the US where Thanksgiving is a big deal and started celebrating Christmas at "grandma and grandpa's" that I even became aware of this plague known as "the holidays". The disease is caused by television, shops at the mall, and our human ability to get caught up in the swing of things so easily. The anti-dotes are family and friends (not all acquaintances), a little baking perhaps, some crafts (that don't have to come close to the Martha Stewart Standard), perhaps religion if that's your thing, and just taking a minute to breathe and think.

So next time you wish someone well this winter. Think about to whom you are speaking and what your wish for them is, but don't feel the need to perpetuate an empty greeting...especially to me.

Thanks...and enjoy the company you keep these cold and dark winter days.

Leah
(and family)